Similarly, you find yourself surrounded by a different group of people. And the people you once thought you'd grow old with, share secrets with, cry with, are no more.
I've struggled with this concept for many years. The process of getting close to people intimidates me for the sole reason that given months, even years, they could be out of your life, having taken a bit of you with them. So what then is the purpose? Why get close to people if the only true guarantor of happiness and security is yourself?
On one hand, these passing people give you a feeling of happiness, of completion and an overwhelming satisfaction with who you are and where you are in life.
But on the other hand, your happiness rests greatly on them, and when the time comes for you to be left out on the road, there isn't much left for you to stand back up, and carry on walking.
This is my problem. My inability to trust, and to hold on to things because I am fully aware of the changing life before us. And because the pain that results is far too great for me to undergo. For this reason, I will let people pass me by, I'll leave them be to their own life, their own ways, and their own happiness. Who am I to stop them?
I guess this is why I prefer to be alone at times, to be beside myself, and to know that whatever happens, I have within myself the strength and the passion to get up, and continue.
My only hope, is that one day I come across you. You may pass me by on a street and flash a grin and leave my life forever, or you might even share a cup of coffee on a corner cafe and exchange stories of love. Whichever it may be, know that for even that small fraction of my life, you have made an impact on my life.
I may not write you, or call you, or text or email you,
but you sat with me, you smiled or cried, you held my hand and kept me close,
and for a tiny sliver of time,
I was yours.
